When you become a mother yourself, something funny happens, and you see your own mother in a totally different light, and it is wonderful. Your relationship with your mother changes undoubtedly, immeasurably, and forever as it’s almost impossible to fully understand the perspective of your mother – until you are one yourself. It is likely that you and your Mom fight sometimes as all mother/daughters do and if not so much as an adult there will sure to have been cross words as you were growing up. There are often things that mothers and daughters fight about over and over again, and you cannot understand why your mom won’t change her opinion on the matter or budge even the tiniest bit in her stance. You might think its something in her personality? A stubbornness? But in all honesty, it is probably to do with her being your mom and putting her concern for you before anything else. Take a look at this list to see how your relationship with your mother changes when you have kids:
You Have Empathy For Past Situations
Between the morning sickness and going crazy from your hormones to every single terrifying and emotionally dizzying part of having an actual child, you suddenly have a lot of empathy for what your mom was going through when she had you. Often you just assume your Mom knew what she was doing, she had some kind of manual to tell her and that she would have been perfect when she was going through all this back then, but you soon learn that that is not the case.
You Speak To Her A Lot More
When you’re pregnant or have a newborn baby, it’s likely that you’ll call or visit your mom a lot. You won’t even have to worry about missing her calls and taking a day or two to call her back because it’s you who is calling her every three hours now as she knows exactly what you’re going through and as the saying goes ‘Mother knows best’.
You Welcome Her Advice
While in the past you might have thought she didn’t know what she was talking, you would refuse her advice and stop her in her tracks when you felt advice coming on. Now, all of a sudden you want her opinion all of the time because her advice might enhance the wellbeing of your child. You also recognise that your mom has a little more experience in the mothering department than you do.
You Need Her
You suddenly become intensely aware of how much comfort your own mother can provide for you. You need her more than ever, and you feel very guilty for not giving her the chance to comfort you more often throughout life when you know she wanted to.
She Understands
When you have a baby, it can feel like your mom is the only person who understands what you’re going through. She is obviously an experienced mother, and you also share DNA, so there is a magical pull there that makes you feel like only your mom gets you right now.
She’s An Amazing Babysitter
You fully trust your Mom with your children, and you don’t feel the need to give her a long list of detailed instructions or call every half hour to check in. You might need to do that with your friends or other family members, but not with your mom. You know that your mom loves your child as much as you do and she’s got this.
You Forgive Her
If there are a lot of grudges and fights that you might have been hanging onto for many years, even your entire life. You’ll be amazed at just how much you are able to forgive your mother for and understand where she was coming from once you’re a mom yourself. In fact, you’ll realise that some of the things you thought she handled poorly, she actually managed pretty well.
You Get Mad At Your Dad
With this newfound appreciation for your mother, you might also notice a newfound disgust for anyone who doesn’t appreciate her. If you see your that dad is not thanking her enough for certain things; then it’s likely you’ll pick him up on it.
You Respect Her So Much More
You now treat your mother with far more respect than you ever have done before. Once you have a baby, you realise how frustrating it is when your own child disrespects you, and you don’t want to put your mom through that pain ever again. In fact, you want to spoil her and show her how much you appreciate her – you can do this with some of AVON’s great mothers day gifts – now that you’re older you know she’d prefer to be spoiled than you making something .
You Let Her Be Right
Before the baby came, you probably had all these ideas about how you were going to discipline them, raise them, feed them and have them sleep. Now that your baby is here and you realise parenthood is far more chaos than you could have ever imagined, you soften up on some of your idealistic parenting ideas and let your mom be right.
You Start Apologizing To Your Mom
Almost every day you will have a moment with your child that reminds you of your own childhood and a time you mistreated or didn’t appreciate your mom. It’s likely that you’ll find yourself calling her to apologise a lot.
You Realise How Strong Your Mom Is
You see you in a completely different light, and you realise that she did things and dealt with things that you never knew. She survived this, and she did it with grace and made it look easy.
You Want To Spend More Time With Her Your mom becomes one of your best friends. Not only do you have a strong biological bond, but she also has infinite wisdom and stories to share. Why would you want to hang out with your friend who doesn’t have kids and who you’ve only known for a few years?