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Parenting

Divorce Parents Problems: The issue with the ‘Visitation’ parent

When parents separate, divorce or never marry, they often have to split custody of the child. Normally, if a cordial agreement is reached, the child spends the week with one parent and may visit the other parent on weekends or twice a month. For the visitation parent, they may be in another relationship or it may be more convenient to not have full time custody of their child.  If the split is contentious, a mediator or court may settle the visitation and child support payments to the custodial parent who keeps the kid most of the time.
Parents that do not have a court ordered payment plan may feel the need to compensate for not having to make  regular support payments  by spoiling the kids rotten and showering them with gifts on the days they have them. This means taking them on trips, fun play parks and of course buying them tons and tons of toys and other goodies to take home.  By showering their kids with gifts on the weekends they have them, these parents may feel like they are buying affection or forgiveness for not being there regularly. The kids love it!
Note that on the first visit with Tom Cruise, he took daughter Suri to Disney world, spurring a bunch of tabloids to speculate that Suri prefers to stay with him.
But the custodial parent isn’t always happy with the “spoilation.”
In real world among regular non-celebrity parents, what happens when the “visitation” parent returns the kids to their custodial parents until the next visit? I’ll tell you what: They create little entitlement kids who expect gifts and toys all the time. The kids also can become jealous of other kids when they receive gifts because they are used to being the subject of material affection. It can make birthday parties when other children are celebrated difficult.
Also, it grows a child who has a sense of entitlement and who expects rewards without hard work.
How to curb this problem? If you are the custodial parent, press upon the visitation parent to NOT give the child a gift at each visit. Instead, give the monetary value of a gift to you to use on the child later. The custodial parent, especially if they do not receive regular child support payment, can use that money for child care so mom/or dad can go out. They can use it to buy a toy when earned.
It’s one of many challenges and struggles that parents and children have to deal with when they are not being parented in the same home by their birth parents. 
Have you had to deal with this challenge? How have you reacted? What have been the response of the kids? What would you suggest other parents’ do to cope or deal?

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20 Websites to Prepare & Celebrate for Kindergarten Graduation

Bellyitch Rewind


It’s that time again for many families with young children: Kindergarten Graduation!!!  In preparation, please check out this lit of 20 blogs becomingananny‘s compiled to inspire you and your friends with different ways that you can make your children’s kindergarten graduation an exceptional experience.  These blog entries cover the ceremony, how to make the cap, recipes for some tasty graduation treats and of course some gift ideas.
The Ceremony
If you are wondering what kind of ceremony to have for your kindergartener and his classmates, these five blog posts will help you come up with some ideas.  The kids are young, so their attention span isn’t incredibly long. This makes it’s important to keep the ceremony short and to the point.  Many times the ceremony can be held during the school day so as to not add any additional budgetary concerns by having the event at night and requiring additional staff.
The Cap
One of the cutest things you can make for your child to wear on their graduation day is a cap and gown.  Some schools choose to rent the gowns and some own them.  Many schools skip the gowns altogether, but stick with the cap and tassel.  These five blog articles will give you some ideas on how to create caps for the kids to wear that aren’t very expensive.  You can get a group of parents together and make them for every student.
The Treats
It wouldn’t be a celebration without treats.  For food, think of different yummy kid friendly snacks, such as finger foods.  While you are considering what snacks to make, try to come up with some that look like a diploma or graduation cap so that the snacks can tie into the event.  The next five blog posts will give you some tasty ideas to make for your little graduates.  Remember, these treats don’t have to be difficult or expensive to feed the guests at your kindergarten graduation.
The Gift
The graduation gift can be anything from favor bags for all of the graduates to something special from mom and dad to commemorate the day.  These bloggers have ideas for both options.  Whatever the present, make sure you take plenty of pictures of the big day so that you can create a mini brag book or some scrapbook pages to remember this milestone event.  The next five blog entries can help you figure out what gift you want to give the graduate in your life.
One of the best gifts you can give your child is your time.  These blog entries have given you lots of ideas on how to celebrate this milestone in your child’s life, but even if your school doesn’t opt to do a big ceremony you can make the day special for your graduate just by being there.  Remember, before you know it you will be celebrating your child’s high school graduation, so make sure not to miss a minute of this ride of a lifetime.

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Watch First Time Expecting Women get pregnancy advice from THEIR moms (VIDEO)

Another Mother’s Day has wrapped. The annual holiday is also a great time for daughters who are mothers to reflect on the advice they were given by their own mothers.
A recent 1-800-Flowers.com survey found that  3 out of 4 women seek their mother’s advice with 18-24 year olds  seeking relationship and health advice; 25-39 year olds seeking parenting advice and 40 to 55 and 55+ seeking home projects insights. 

The relationship differs depending on age. Millennials say they are best friends with their moms, they talk about everything (36.9%); while Gen Xers and Boomers say their relationship with mom is complicated (31.2% and 31.0% respectively).
It’s no surprise then to discover that the survey results found that 79% of women would feel positively if someone told them they were just like their mother.
And first time pregnant women too turn to their moms for advice and counsel on what to expect.

The Daily Share sat first-time mothers-to-be across from THEIR moms to ask them any and every question they had about what to expect from motherhood.

The result is a candid and endearing short video. Check it out:





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REVIEW: ‘Zero to Five’ is the perfect handbook to instruct on how to raise a super smart baby

Parenting books can be overwhelming and so condensely written as to turn off busy parents who may put one  down and forget to pick it back up subconsciously mindful of all the text they have to go through to finish.

Zero to Five, 70  Essential Parenting Tips Based On Science (and What I’ve Learned So Far)” is the anecdote. The book is part handbook, part photo book, part advice text and part testimonials.  It’s all in this oversized resource guide bound together in a spiral binder format.

Readers can sit down and immerse in all the pages at once, or just browse through and flip. Each page covers a new tips, tools or suggestions for raising super smart, alert, active and creative children. There is ample inclusion of BTDT advice from moms and other nuggets from tried and true sources.

Journalist, mom and wife Tracy Clutchlow, who is featured on the cover along with her adorable daughter, does a great job jamming just the right amount of fuel of knowledge in this very useful and informative guide.

It’s a great book for this new generation of “reader” parents who enjoy absorbing all the latest advice that is available out from veteran parents, pediatrician and child-care experts.  But it is also well written and included enough vibrant photography, font variations and side bars to keep the attention and inform the category of parents who are not really into all of that — who just want the basics, plus a little more.

I enjoyed this book a lot and would recommend it for new first-time parents as a baby shower gift or a refresher for a vet parent as well.

Pick up a copy at Amazon.com!

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