Father’s Day for children of an absentee dad or who are products of divorce can be hard. Whether by reason of divorce, death or abandonment, the day can be challenging also for single moms. Women who are solo parents by choice also must deal with the stresses of filling both Mom and Dad’s shoes and that includes surviving Father’s Day.
HuffPost Divorce single parent expert Kerri Zane offered some salient advice in a 2013 post. An excerpt:
1. Realize the day may be difficult for your kids. For single moms dealing with a divorce situation, a day honoring the one you least like in your life, at the moment, can seem unfathomable. This is the time to step into your children’s shoes. As tough as that pill is to swallow, you have to embrace the fact that they love you and they love him, too. It is an important day for you to allow them to celebrate their father without feeling any remorse or fear that they might be hurting your feelings.
2. Don’t pass judgment. Keep an upbeat attitude about your former husband. Your kids still respect him and want to please him. It is in your best interest to always be level-headed around your children and keep your unfiltered ex thoughts to yourself. On Father’s Day in particular you might even want to step up and share one of the reasons you fell in love with their dad in the first place. Extra brownie points for that!
3. Relax into the day. For divorced mommies an extra Sunday all to yourself can be a blessing. Try not to dwell on what the day used to be when you were one big “happy” family. Instead shift your focus and make it a day of cherished me-time. Do something for yourself that you wouldn’t normally do. Spend the day at the spa, get a massage, take an extra long walk, go to the beach and take a cheeky novel or lounge by a pool. Hang out with your other single mom girlfriends, drink mimosas and have a TGIEF=Thank God It’s Ex-Father’s Day.
4. Honor the dad that once was. If Dad’s no longer around because he’s passed on, allow your children to choose how they want to honor him. They can spend the day creating a card, writing a poem, reminiscing with scrapbooks or doing an activity they always used to do with him. It can be particularly challenging because it opens wounds for the passing of your loved one too, so go easy on yourself. If you feel like being sad, it’s okay. It’s real and heartfelt. Share your fondest memories and tell the stories in great detail, they’ll love hearing about him from your loving perspective.
Sage advice indeed. Read more form the original post in HuffPost Divorce HERE
School is out!
Week one of summer vacation has just closed. (For the lucky few of you whose kids are still in school, you’re in our prayers).
Now as you wait for summer camp to start or the grandparents to come and get the kids for their annual family bonding time with your brood, what is there to do?
As any frugal parent knows – LOTS!
Canada’s Slice Magazine has come up with the twenty activities, crafted from dollar store finds, that will make your home the kiddie hang out spot for the summer.
So let the glow-in-the-dark ring toss and noodle obstacle course games begin!
Read more at Slice
– Chelsea Social
If you plan to host a baby shower this Spring or Summer, you are fortunate to have more options and flexibility than in the Fall or Winter. Backyards, rooftops and patios become options for a venue. You can save money too by hosting it at a park or making your own favors with outdoorsy themes versus buying them like the super cute tutu nail polishes and the “Ready to Pop” favors above.
Shower hosts can serve cool and refreshing mocktails too like the “Summer Is Coming Mocktail” created by Zico brand ambassador and celebrity nutritionist, Tanya Zuckerbrot, of the renowned F-Factor Diet.
It’s made with Zico‘s newest flavor: watermelon raspberry coconut water. I mixed up a batch using a sampling of complimentary stock Zico provided me. I thoroughly enjoyed it and because there is no alcohol in it, I shared some with the kids and they loved it too. The lime and mint garnishes give it the perfect kick at the end. Yummy. Here is the recipe for the Summer Is Coming Mocktail recipe:
1 1/2 cups ZICO watermelon raspberry coconut water
1 small seedless watermelon, flesh removed and diced (about 4 cups total)
2 cans zero-calorie lemon-lime soda
mint, for garnish
- In a blender, puree the coconut water, diced watermelon and juice from the limes.
- Pour the mixture into a pitcher over ice.
- Serve by pouring 2 oz. of the pureed mixture into a glass. Fill to the top with lemon-lime soda and mix lightly to combine.
- Garnish with mint.
And before you start planning for a Spring or Summer shower, you must head over to Pinterest and there you will discover links to many websites and blogs choc full of fab ideas. Here is a select few to start you off:
Crystal and Comp
Parenting is really hard but it doesn’t always have to be. We got your back! Whenever we at Bellyitch bump into another blog or site offering handy dandy shortcuts, tips and tools to make the job easier, you know we’re gonna let you know.
For example, the Awesome Daily put together an awesome list of “21 Parenting Hacks” for the modern, busy, multitasking mom and dad. And these tips are great for baby sitters, grandma and other folks who may have to watch your kid.
These are our faves, including the strategically placed mirror that lets you spy on the rugrats causing ruckus below while you’re upstairs folding laundry. A couple others:
For that lazy parent who doesn’t want to stand in the sun, bored and pushing a kid on a swing, this set up saves the day!
No junior doesn’t have to jack up your walls when you have a handy dandy leftover box just for letting him let out his creative juices!
Head over to The Awesome Daily and peep the rest:
We are halfway into Spring. How is your seasonal organizing in preparation for Summer coming along?
I’m behind as usual. I finished cleaning out my attic in early Spring, but still have the basement to sort out.
At least I got a jump start of my family and business filing organizing. I got a kick in the butt when Staples generously sent me one of its “Get Organized for Spring” kits which included some binders, dividers, hole punch and other tools for getting my stacks of paper in check!
I started keeping track of all the household and filing to-do’s by creating a family binder and a small business binder with help of Jennifer Ford Berry‘s popular book series “Organize Now!” I was fortunate to nab one of these handy guides at my town yard sale, unused! It was what I needed to get everything to organize my family budget, my business marketing plans, my to-do lists and other aspects of my super busy life.
Organizing your household is not just good for de-cluttering but it could also raise your energy level, help relieve anxiety and clear room in your mind to focus on other matters that will bring joy, good fortune and happiness. I’m a big believer in Feng Shui and clarity we get from keeping things in order. Also blame the fact I’m a Type-A, Eldest child and a Virgo!
The Staples binders came in quite handy to separate the categories. I used the hole punch to keep large receipts in place under their respective tabs in the binder.
Feel free to borrow the categories I used to separate the dividers in my binders:
- Warranty information
- Life insurance information
- Budget/spending record
- Bills to pay
- Utilities/services directory
- Home decorating ideas
- Car maintenance schedule/Receipts
- School schedules and holiday list
- Lunch menus
- School information page
- School reading lists
- Summer Camp and programs information
- Medical information sheet for each family member
- Emergency directory
- Prescription drug record
- Health insurance information
- Travel packing checklist
- Before-we-leave checklist
- Vacation idea list
- Home renovation contractor lists
- House-sitter information sheet
- PTA newsletters and rosters
- Business records
- Tax Documents for Personal
- Tax Documents for Business
- Big Ticket Items receipts
- Consultants and Independent Contractor records
- Liability Insurance
- Business & Office Equipment registry
Hope these are helpful to you as you get yourself and your family organized for the season! Good luck!