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Did you Know ‘The Pregnancy Loss Club’ is Just like ‘Fight Club’?

loss

If you have ever had a miscarriage early in a pregnancy and gone on to successfully conceive and have live births to subsequent children, then you are part of a very very large sorority of women.

You are also among those who likely had little to no information about the prevalence of miscarriage before hand and who likely received insufficient follow up support.  You are also among a secret society of people who do not talk much about suffering a miscarriage. You are a member of The Pregnancy Loss Club.

HuffPo writer and mom of three Alexandra Owens wrote about her and her husband’s experience of losing their very first child, who was unplanned, unlike their subsequent children:

And that was it. No follow-up, no pamphlets on loss, no mention of it – nothing. Because I was a stat – especially being only 11 weeks – and they weren’t being cold on purpose. They were just following the unspoken rules.

PLC club rules

1. Don’t talk about PLC

2. Offer minimal support to avoid awkwardness

3. Don’t screen for postpartum depression. The chances of being affected are slim anyway because they weren’t that far along or didn’t actually have a baby

4. Remind them that they are still young and can have plenty more children. Or remind them to be grateful for the children they already have

After my husband and I came home I had zero clue what to do. I had convinced myself that this wasn’t a big deal. That I could easily move on. That is, of course, until my latte spilled all over the carpet and I lost it.

I can relate very much as it almost mirrors my exact experience after having a miscarriage of my very first child. I too went on to have three children like this author. Her piece hit home.

It’s a wonderful and insightful piece that I recommend you all read.

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