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A Pregnant Woman’s Guide to Surviving Thanksgiving without Knocking Someone Out

Thanksgiving-dinner_stock

So you’re heading to your cousin’s home upstate for Thanksgiving this year and as much fun as the season is for reconnecting and reuniting with family, it’s also known for being tense, sometimes. You may experience old grudges barely buried rise from the dead for discussion again at the dinner table. Nosy meddling elders will ask a bunch of inappropriate questions. You’ll get tons of unsolicited advice on names, parenting tips, and a bunch of do’s and don’ts.

Being pregnant and having extra hormones, a shorter fused and less patience and one snide remark about how wide your butt has gotten could send you over the edge. Woooosah! You can survive it all with these few tips:

  • Practice your Fake Smile now that you conjure up to prepare yourself for the onslaught of well-meaning, albeit personally invasive questions. (Are you sure you’re not having twins? So you’re sticking with that name, huh? Are you done or are you gonna try for one more? You look like you’ve gained a lot; maybe you shouldn’t eat that?)
  • Carry one of those small stress ball that you can squeeze to ease the tension when inevitably someone thinks its funny to compare your belly to the Butterball . You don’t want to knock anybody out and ruin Thanksgiving.
  • Wear something light. In fact, layer. A maternity tank, under a shirt, under a light sweater should do so you can unpeel as you get warm. The homeowner probably had the oven on all day cooking and baking.  A big belly and sweaty under breasts are not a good combination. Save the cute sweater dress for Christmas tree shopping.

5 THINGS A PREGNANT WOMAN SHOULD NOT  WEAR ON THANKSGIVING

  • 4. Go easy on the sugary foods. If you haven’t already had your gestational diabetes test yet, you’re gonna want to skip the sweet potato pie and the apple pie… and the pumpkin pie. Having to prick your finger three times a day  all because you lost your mind and went and elevated your sugar 1000 percent is not the business. No ma’am.
  • Take any offer of someone who gets up so you can have a comfy seat. That may be the last time you see your obnoxious cousin exercise good manners. Besides, pregnancy is for maximizing in and all empathy perks you can get.
  •  As for footwear, you’re going to want to skip the heels and go with some ballet flats, boots or low wedges. Your center of gravity is off with your growing belly. Sky high heels+ a plate of food +a preggers woman = an accident waiting to happen.

You’re going to get a lot of unsolicited advice, a couple of jabs and maybe a tacky joke or two coming at you and it may get overwhelming. Go in getting ready to hear it all but don’t take it personal, they only mean well. You can pick friends, but you can’t pick family.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

photo: Starcast

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