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3 Breastfeeding Myths Busted!

woman breastfeeding

There is so much to learn about when preparing for a new baby. Car seats, cribs, diapers, and breastfeeding.  Often confusing, and sometimes frightening, breastfeeding advice comes with different points of view and opinions. 

Here are three myths to bust!

1. HAND-EXPRESSING MILK IS A WASTE OF TIME



FALSE!

A recent study by Dr. Jane Morton revealed that hand expression of milk has been an under-utilized skill. There are many benefits of knowing how to express milk from the breast without the use of a pump. Learn more from Stanford Medicine, Newborn Nursery at Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital.

2. ZONING OUT IS BAD FOR BREAST MILK PRODUCTION.

FALSE!

In a study conducted by Dr. Stephen Feher, groups of moms whose babies were in the NICU and who had to pump their milk were given relaxation and visualization tapes to help reduce stress. 

After one week, the moms expressed 63% more breast milk! 

3. Herbal Lactation Supplements Must Have Fenugreek to Work



FALSE!

For centuries, certain herbs and foods have been used in different cultures to promote breast milk production.



While fenugreek has been the go-to galactagogue (a substance that increases milk supply) in the US for many years and works well for some women, others may experience some undesirable side effects while taking it. In one survey of nursing mothers in the United States, 85 had used fenugreek as a galactagogue and 45% of those mothers reported having experienced an adverse reaction from the supplement.

In fact, Luna Feehan, the owner of Legendairy Milk® experienced this firsthand with her son when her lactation consultant recommended she try a fenugreek tincture. After determining it was not a good fit for her or her baby, she began to research other galactagogues used in various parts of the world to support milk production.

There you go! Knowing is half the battle!

Prep Kids In Advance In Case They Get Exposed to Adult Content Online

 

The internet is a powerful tool – you can learn a lot, communicate with others, shop and even date. Its wondrous vastness is even more impressive in the eyes of the young and inexperienced. Kids can learn a lot but they could also be exposed to unsuitable content online.

 Studies show that 42 percent of internet users aged 10 to 17 will see adult content online. Of these children, 66 percent saw the content unwillingly.

 As a parent, you’re responsible for preparing your child. You have to prepare little ones for the exciting aspects of life, for embarrassing and even dangerous situations.

 When kids have the knowledge, they’re equipped with the tools to address uncomfortable or confusing situations.

 While talking about adult content is difficult, it can have a profoundly positive effect on the development of your child.

 Provide The Right Kind of Sex-Ed

Sex-ed should be age-appropriate and it should occur before a child ever has the chance to view adult content online.

 There are many books and resources you can rely on to determine what’s appropriate at the age of five, at 10 or 15.

 It’s Not the Stork!, for example, is a great choice for children aged four and up. The book presents anatomical terms and aspects of human sexuality that kids within the age range can understand. Their questions will be answered and more complex issues will be addressed as they grow older.

 Talk about Online Safety

Understanding one’s sexuality is just one part of the process. To prevent online exposure to online content, however, you should also address the issue of internet safety.

 Exposure to online pornography when kids aren’t prepared may have serious consequences.

 Thus, you should address some of the dangers lurking online. You should also talk about the ways to stay away from such dangers.

Kids should know what to do if they come across inappropriate content online.

Tell kids that such images and videos are meant for an adult audience and they should never be seen by children.

Tell kids what to do if an adult ever sends them inappropriate content. You should build trust so that little ones come to you immediately in such situations. If children believe that something inappropriate has happened and they keep the information from you, chances are that the consequences will become even more serious.

It’s only a matter of time, before your child becomes a teen or tween and young adult and eventually get exposed to popular dating sites that are mentioned in memes, YouTube videos and the sort, like DoULike.com and others. 

Let Your Kid Ask Questions

While giving information is very important, you should also listen to your child.

Give your child a chance to ask questions, whether they’re curious or they’ve already seen something they shouldn’t have seen. 

Be prepared for such conversations. 

Your child could ask about issues that may shock you, that you feel uncomfortable with. If you freak out, however, you will potentially lose some of the trust that you’ve already established. 

Give yourself a moment to calm down and provide an age-appropriate explanation. If you’re worried, ask your kid about whether they’ve encountered a term or an activity. Keeping the conversation going, even if you’re worried out of your mind, could help for the best possible resolution.

Set Some House Rules

The model you establish at home will affect many aspects of your child’s behavior at school or when they visit friends.

Make it very, very clear what’s permissible and what’s not.

You may also want to use browsing filters to limit access to certain types of websites or content. Parental control software can accomplish numerous goals and choosing one option or the other depends entirely on your preferences and the level of control you are to achieve.

Don’t Get into Too Much Information

While an open discussion is a key to preparing your child for unexpected situations, there’s such a thing as TMI (too much information).

There are issues that aren’t appropriate for kids and that little one cannot understand. A child’s maturity level and the information you’ve already provided will be determining for what’s appropriate to discuss and what isn’t. 

Even if your kid has questions, you’re not obliged to answer comprehensively. Tell them that a specific conversation can be had later on or that they’re too young to understand the specifics. Telling your child to remind you about the question, later on, is a good way out of the situation.

 Having a discussion about adult content is not easy but this is a normal part of life. Online media and the tech-savvy nature of little ones both contribute to new parental challenges you will have to handle as an adult.

 If your child has already been exposed to inappropriate online content, you will first of all have to comfort them. There are websites out there that could be pretty disturbing even to an adult audience.

 Tell your child that they haven’t done anything wrong. Once the initial emotions subside, you can move on to answering questions and providing a bit of important education. Remember that this is an ongoing process and maintain your involvement, even after the original discussion has been had.

How to Get The Best Deals Even If You’re Not A Prime Member

Amazon Prime Day is really two days, Monday, July 15 and Tuesday, July 16, and is a day the online retailer puts a lot of its products on sale for a heavily discounted price.

A lot of companies that use Amazon to distribute their goods to their market also put their items on sale these two says as well.

If you don’t have a membership, don’t fear, you can get a Free 30 Day Trial by Signing up Today with my Affiliate Link Here then taking advantage of the deals.

If you do not ship products from Amazon as much as our and a lot of other families do, neither enjoy all the videos from its Prime Video then you can feel free to cancel the $13 monthly membership at the end of the trial and keep all the heavily discounted stuff you nab during prime day!

What I Have My Eye On:

I am a Prime Member on the hunt for a new Amazon Firestick for my mom and for our basement TV.

$15 Amazon Fire Sticks

The popular device for streaming that many cord cutters like myself use and rely on will be on sale for just $15 tomorrow, over half off its original price of $40.

Sweet! Make sure to get yours!

$1.99 Marvel Movies

Also, on the list for this family of Marvel Cinematic Universe Marvel MCU fans, Amazon is selling Guardians of the Galaxy, Spider-Man: Homecoming, Iron Man 3, Black Panther, Avengers: Infinity War and more for just $1.99 a piece. 

That is cheaper than renting a downstream on many networks and platforms.

Instapot for half off

Finally, I’ve been meaning to invest in one of the fancy new slow cookers that cook meals in about an hour. The Instant Pot Duo 6-quart 7-in-1 pressure cooker is half off and going for $49.99 (regularly $99)

To get it this deal, you need to click (or tap) the on-page $10-off coupon before adding it to your cart. 

Other Deals

There are other deals available that thrifty shoppers might be interested in that I’ve summarized below.†

Echo for $50 (regularly $100)

Facebook Portal for $80 (regularly $199). 

The deals are pretty good as the previous year.

Amazon’s Home Security Camera, the Cloud Cam is $120

Fire 7 tablet is $30. Get it!

Fire HD 8 tablet is $50 ($regularly $80. Get it!

Fire HD 10 tablet too is $50 (regularly $99). Get it!



Fire TV Cube is $70 (regularly $120). Get it!

GOOD LUCK AND HAPPY SHOPPING!

How To Ensure Your Family Has Clean Water

We all know how important water is to all forms of life. It is all around us, in the clouds, streams, rivers, lakes, and oceans. It is the single most essential aspect of our lives, and we can’t survive without it.

With a lot of tap water being known to contain contaminants, it is a good idea to look into alternative options, such as filtration systems to ensure that the water you and your family drinks is safe, clean, and tasting like water should.

Tap Water and Known Contaminants

Tap water has been shown time and again to contain contaminants that can be detrimental to human health. This is bad news for anyone who doesn’t have bottled water handy, who don’t have a refrigerator with a built in water dispenser, or just folks who want to know they are drinking safe water.

Did you know that estimates provided by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) show that around 60,000 chemicals are added to public water sources in the United States? Shockingly, only 91 of these are actually regulated by the Safe Water Drinking Act. With the alarms sounding in many folks’ heads over lead discovered in the Flint, Michigan water supply, it is quite easy to understand why so many people are worried about the safety of their tap water.

Just two of the contaminants that are known to be in tap water include:

Chlorine and Chloramine: Disinfectants added to the water supply, chlorine is usually thought to be the main chemical added to swimming pools to make the water blue and crisp. This doesn’t, however, mean that it is safe for human consumption. Chlorine (and its longer-lasting and harder to filter chemical twin, chloramine), are known to have links to cancer, miscarriages, and more.

Lead: Lead finds its way into public water supply through outdated pipes. It can cause blood disorders and brain damage, and is also known to cause even more issues in children, such as developmental disorders and mental deficiencies.

With contaminants that are known to cause so many issues floating around in public drinking water, it is no wonder many people are looking into other sources for getting their drinking water, such as bottled water, digging a well, or looking into a whole house water filtration system to get all these bad chemicals out.

Home Water Filtration

Whole house water filtration systems can be an excellent way for you to filter out all these contaminants in your drinking water. There are all sorts of filtration systems out there for you to choose from, with great benefits such as easy installation, systems that can filter out the bad chemicals and leave in the healthy minerals that actually do help, and some that soften the water for you! A recent review by iPropertyManagement that compares the pros and cons of many whole house water filtration systems is worth reading.

With a whole host of filtration systems on the market, it may seem like a daunting task to decide which one is the best for you and your family. Luckily, affordable filtration systems are within reach for almost anyone looking to get into the water purification game. Companies like iSpring, Home Master, and 3M have you covered with wallet-friendly filtration options, so you can rest easier knowing you are putting only the good minerals found in your drinking water into your body, and not the potentially harmful contaminants.

The Good News

You don’t have to be content with the fact that public drinking supplies seem to be ridden with things that are known to be harmful to humans. There are many options available to you to make sure you are getting only the best from your water supply, and knowing just how important it is to drink plenty of water, you are naturally only going to want to drink pure water, not something laced with contaminants.

Well water is one way to truly own your water supply, but it can be out of the question for many families, as it can be quite pricey to dig a well. Many families opt to exclusively bottled water, but depending on how many people are in your family and how much water they drink, this can be a pricey option as well.

A water filtration system is a one-time, affordable purchase that will allow you to get the good from your water, without having to worry about the bad, and that is something to feel good about!

Prep In Advance In Case Your Kid Gets Exposed to Adult Content Online

Photo by bruce mars from Pexels

The internet is a powerful tool – you can learn a lot, communicate with others, shop and even date. Its wondrous vastness is even more impressive in the eyes of the young and inexperienced. Kids can learn a lot but they could also be exposed to unsuitable content online.

Studies show that 42 percent of internet users aged 10 to 17 will see adult content online. Of these children, 66 percent saw the content unwillingly.

As a parent, you’re responsible for preparing your child. You have to prepare little ones for the exciting aspects of life, for embarrassing and even dangerous situations.

When kids have the knowledge, they’re equipped with the tools to address uncomfortable or confusing situations.

While talking about adult content is difficult, it can have a profoundly positive effect on the development of your child.

Take Control Over How Your Child Gets the Information

Sex-ed should be age-appropriate and it should occur before a child ever has the chance to view adult content online.

There are many books and resources you can rely on to determine what’s appropriate at the age of five, at 10 or 15.

It’s Not the Stork!, for example, is a great choice for children aged four and up. The book presents anatomical terms and aspects of human sexuality that kids within the age range can understand.

Their questions will be answered and more complex issues will be addressed as they grow older.

Talk about Online Safety

Understanding one’s sexuality is just one part of the process. To prevent online exposure to online content, however, you should also address the issue of internet safety.

Exposure to online pornography when kids aren’t prepared may have serious consequences.

Thus, you should address some of the dangers lurking online. You should also talk about the ways to stay away from such dangers.

Kids should know what to do if they come across inappropriate content online.

Tell kids that such images and videos are meant for an adult audience and they should never be seen by children.

Tell kids what to do if an adult ever sends them inappropriate content. You should build trust so that little ones come to you immediately in such situations.

If children believe that something inappropriate has happened and they keep the information from you, chances are that the consequences will become even more serious.

It’s only a matter of time, before your child becomes a teen or tween and young adult and eventually get exposed to popular dating sites that are mentioned in memes, YouTube videos and the sort, like DoULike.com and others. Make sure they can recognize when they’re getting re-routed.

Let Your Kid Ask Questions

While giving information is very important, you should also listen to your child.

Give your child a chance to ask questions, whether they’re curious or they’ve already seen something they shouldn’t have seen.

Be prepared for such conversations.

Your child could ask about issues that may shock you, that you feel uncomfortable with. If you freak out, however, you will potentially lose some of the trust that you’ve already established.

Give yourself a moment to calm down and provide an age-appropriate explanation. If you’re worried, ask your kid about whether they’ve encountered a term or an activity. Keeping the conversation going, even if you’re worried out of your mind, could help for the best possible resolution.

Set Some House Rules

The model you establish at home will affect many aspects of your child’s behavior at school or when they visit friends.

Make it very, very clear what’s permissible and what’s not.

You may also want to use browsing filters to limit access to certain types of websites or content. Parental control software can accomplish numerous goals and choosing one option or the other depends entirely on your preferences and the level of control you are to achieve.

Don’t Get into Too Much Information

While an open discussion is a key to preparing your child for unexpected situations, there’s such a thing as TMI (too much information).

There are issues that aren’t appropriate for kids and that little one cannot understand. A child’s maturity level and the information you’ve already provided will be determining for what’s appropriate to discuss and what isn’t.

Even if your kid has questions, you’re not obliged to answer comprehensively. Tell them that a specific conversation can be had later on or that they’re too young to understand the specifics. Telling your child to remind you about the question, later on, is a good way out of the situation.

Having a discussion about adult content is not easy but this is a normal part of life. Online media and the tech-savvy nature of little ones both contribute to new parental challenges you will have to handle as an adult.

If your child has already been exposed to inappropriate online content, you will first of all have to comfort them. There are websites out there that could be pretty disturbing even to an adult audience.

Tell your child that they haven’t done anything wrong. Once the initial emotions subside, you can move on to answering questions and providing a bit of important education. Remember that this is an ongoing process and maintain your involvement, even after the original discussion has been had

8 Great Gift Ideas for New Moms

Author: Benjamin Lee

Whether you’re a spouse, family member or friend, the birth of a new baby is always a joy. To celebrate this joyous occasion, it’s natural to want to shower both baby and mom with plenty of gifts. 

Ideally, your gift should be both heartfelt and thoughtful. However, in a market saturated with baby gifts, it can be difficult to make a choice. Not all of us are particularly great at gifting. While the thought really does count, buying the new mum a wrong gift is a major boo-boo.

Oftentimes, new mums are inundated with baby shoes and clothes amongst others. Get to know the mother first and who knows, maybe she is a sports fan and you can give her a themed baby gift. You would be surprised, but since we are in the NFL preseason, do you know the American football league has a section for toddlers, with bodysuits that have the badge or logo of the different teams?  

But what about mum herself? Doesn’t she deserve to enjoy herself to? To lend you a hand, here are some great gifting ideas for the new mum.

1. Gift cards

While not the most original, gift cards allow the new mum to buy herself or baby something nice. After the initial stress of childbirth, she should be allowed to reward herself. For a different take, you can also put together an assortment of gift cards for the new mum. This allows her to pick and choose gifts for her and the baby.

2. A spa session

While we can all agree that childbirth is a beautiful thing, the entire experience often leaves new mums drained and tired. This is why a comprehensive spa session may be just what the doctor ordered. From relaxing deep tissue massages to cleansing body scrubs, she’ll leave the spa feeling refreshed and energized. 

3. The Amazon Echo Dot

Chances are mum’s gonna have her hands full caring for her bundle of joy. Why not lend her a hand with the Amazon Echo Dot, a voice-controlled virtual assistant. With the Echo Dot, let Alexa lend a hand around the house. Whether you’re making appointments with the pediatrician or checking the weather, the Echo Dot is a great gift for tech-savvy mummies out there.

4. Personalized clothing

The birth of a child should be a commemorative affair for the entire household. For something a bit special, personalized clothing like a t-shirt for mum and a jumper for baby are a great choice. The t-shirt and jumper can have baby’s name and date of birth or something cutesy like a picture embroidered on.

5. A yoga mat

Post-birth, mum would most likely be very eager to shed off those pounds. So why not help her out by giving her with a yoga mat. Yoga is a low-impact form of exercise that helps new mum’s shed weight. Along with this, yoga helps to relax the mind and reduce stress, all of which would be extremely helpful for a new mother.

6. Baby car seat

For any parent, the safety and wellbeing of their child is number one. This is even more so for the mum and dad of a newborn baby. Give them the gift of safety with a top-quality baby car seat. These car seats are designed to transport a new-born baby safely and comfortably thus giving mum or dad peace of mind when they’re on the road.

7. Baby accessories

Besides being absolutely adorable, baby accessories also ensure that baby is warm and comfortable at all times. With their weak immune systems, it’s fairly easy for a newborn child to catch a chill. A baby cap will protect the little one from catching a chill while baby mittens will protect him/her from accidentally scratching themselves.

8. Maternity bras

Nursing the newborn baby can be a challenge for any mum as breastfeeding can mean sore or tender breasts. So, give her all the support she needs with a quality maternity bra. These bras are specially designed to be soft and easy to wear while also making feeding baby a cinch.

All the Reasons College Is the Right Next Step For Your Child

Teen with backpack

We want what’s best for our children and when it comes to education, the more opportunities we give them, the better chance they have at achieving a job that they love and are passionate about.

That’s something that’s rarer than we’d like to believe to be, so here’s why it’s important to encourage your children to study further education.

Adds More Strings To Their Bow

Depending on the career path they take further down the line is also caused by how much experience, skills and knowledge that they’ve learned and earnt throughout their early years.

So, you should be exposing your children to opportunities from the very moment that they’re able to understand what’s going on in life. Think about different classes that you can take your children to whether it’s cub scouts or language classes.

Encouraging them to take part in extra-curricular activities is important because it will all be on their CV when it comes to securing their first job. By studying further education, it’s adding an extra string to their bow that will likely come very much in handy when they apply for their career jobs after graduating.

The more further education they get, the better. It’s also good to know that there are courses like this MA in business administration through distance learning, meaning that there are still options to study, even if they don’t want to leave home. 

It Gives Them Memorable Life Experiences

You’d give your children the world if you could, but the least you can do is to encourage them to take up further education. Going away to study, away from home, gives them memorable life experiences that will last a lifetime. \

Being away from home, you have to become independent, and that can be difficult if you’ve stopped your child from exploring this independency by going on school trips or joining groups that go out and learn about fending for yourself.

Further education is where your child is likely to make friends for life and more importantly, learns how to budget their own money and to look after themselves without you. Yes, it’s probably not something any parent wants, but there will come a time in your child’s life where you need to let them spread their wings and fly. 

Encourages A Natural Eagerness To Learn

By exposing them to more opportunities, you are building up their passion and eagerness to learn. It’s also influenced by how much you are interested in learning. Maybe that’s taking a trip to the local museum together or reading a book. If they see that you have a passion for learning, then they’ll want to do the same thing.

Children are certainly influenced by their surroundings and that includes their parents. Make the most of school holidays and instead of staying in, go out and do some exploring. Use every opportunity the chance to learn something new, and they’ll grow up hopefully, with that same natural eagerness to learn.

Hopefully, that means they’ll be more inclined to pursue further education when they are old enough to do so.

It also helps with discipline. When studying, they’ll need to be able to control themselves and to manage their own work without a teacher telling them what to do. Sure they’ll have lectures, but that lecturer is only going to be made available to them at the lecture.

It’s unlike high-school where they have teachers giving them guidance and telling them what to do. This all contributes to the discipline that they’ll need when they come out of further education.

It’s needed for their job and whatever they eventually do with their lives.

More Chance Of Being Financially Stable

Money can end up controlling your life and the way you live. It’s important though that money is not the be-all and end-all when it comes to living. However, that being said, the more education and skills you attain, the more chance that your children will be financially stable.

It’s not so much how much money is coming in from their paycheck but more about being able to live comfortably in relation to their lifestyle that they live. So that doesn’t mean that they need to be earning triple figures to be living comfortably.

Some examples of how they’ll use their finances through higher education are when they receive any grants or loans to help pay for their living costs. Having to pay rent for the first time and any bills that go along with it. Knowing how to budget and what they’ll need each month to be able to get by.

These skills will all be important for when they go into adult life and when times get tough financially. 

It Helps Spark New Ideas And Changes Perspectives

Having more life experience and education can help spark new ideas, but it also changes a lot of perspectives.

When we open ourselves up to learn more and to involve ourselves with cultures and experiences that are new to us, we grow as individuals. That’s what you want most for your children, is that they’ll become a well-balanced individual who has learnt to be brave, to fight for what they believe in and to listen to those without a voice.

With as much life experience as possible, they’ll want to explore things that are new to them and hopefully help influence and change the way the world currently is. That they’re contributing to a better world, right?

A Bigger Social Network

Further education reaches out to people across the globe, so no matter where they end up studying, they will likely meet people from all over the place. It’s important to do this because they’ll then have a bigger social network that reaches beyond their hometown.

Having more social connections is rewarding, but it’s also helpful in widening their opportunities that come from having such a wide range of friendships. Imagine all the free stays they could get with friends across the globe?

The more connections that your child knows, the more it will help benefit them throughout their lifetime. That’s why it’s so important that your child continues to pursue higher education beyond high school. 

You can encourage them to socialize from an early age, and it’s good to take them to sports classes and other activities where they can get that opportunity to make as many friends as they choose to.

These friends might be temporary, but it will teach them the social skills they need in order to not be afraid when approaching someone they don’t know. 

Further education should always be something that is a choice for your child, and it’s up to them if they want to do it or not.

Yes, it does bear a financial cost but the experience, skills, and knowledge they get from it, isn’t really something they’d get by just going through adult life. So when it comes to reminding yourself why it’s important to encourage further education, here is a recap. Remember that it adds more strings to their bow and will open up more opportunities further down the line in terms of career prospects and experiences.

The life experiences that they earn from further education will certainly be a memorable one. It will encourage a natural eagerness to learn and a discipline that they’ll need in life. It sparks new ideas, a different perspective, and a bigger social network too.

And finally, it helps bring a bit of financial stability, so what’s not to like?

Make Vacation Hotel Stays More Fun For the Kids

family in hotel entertaining selves

If you’re on vacation, chances are there will be a lot of down time in the hotel room. Your child may find the lack of space in the room restrictive, which could prompt unruly behavior or temper tantrums. Help them avoid boredom or cabin fever with some fun games and toys. It’s unrealistic to bring the contents of the playroom with you on vacation

. However, you can bring along some compact game and toy options, or you can create your own activities that require little to no equipment.

Here are some ways you can keep your little ones entertained during your hotel stay:

Dress-Up

If you have a little girl, have a mini-fashion show in your hotel room. The two of you can get her prepared for her debut with outfit preparation followed by spa services. Perform a special facial, paint nails and create a fun hair-do. You can easily pack a few accent pieces in your suitcase, like ribbon, costume jewelry or your daughter’s favorite dress. This activity is ideal for the child who enjoys planning and is enthusiastic about dress-up. It will require some patience on her part– but if you keep the energy high and have fun, it will keep her occupied and the two of you will have a blast.

Puzzles

Puzzles are time-consuming activities that can keep a child’s attention. If you have enough room in your luggage, pack some jigsaw puzzles. The two of you should pick out a jigsaw that is your child’s favorite animal or animated character, so they’re excited about the final product. The more enthusiastic they are about the content, the more time they’ll commit. If you have limited space for jigsaws, you can bring along some printed word puzzles. Include terms or words that are at your child’s reading level. You can make the theme of the puzzle reflect your child’s favorite hobbies, books or movies.

Card Games

Cards are compact and can be easily transported–they make a great alternative to board games. You can bring along a pack of regular playing cards for games like go fish, speed or gin rummy. Bicycle offers a six pack of kids card games that include Go Fish, Slap Jack, Memory, Matching, Old Maid and Crazy Eights. These cards are well-illustrated, colorful and designed especially for kids. Uno is another fun card game that is great for the entire family, as you can incorporate many players.

Music Video

Get the creative juices flowing and produce a music video with your kid. They can choose their favorite song, and the two of you can storyboard the visual elements. You can orchestrate outfits and practice choreographed dance moves. The video can be recorded on your tablet or smartphone. Many smartphones have video editing capabilities or apps, so you can instantly assemble the footage and polish it up for presentation. Your child will love to watch themselves perform and it is a fun, creative activity the two of you can do together.

Bath Adventure

Liven up bathtime and make the tub an adventurous oasis. The tub is like a mini pool where your kids can hang out and play with their bath toys. Bring along the essential rubber ducky or foam figures, so your child can entertain themselves with these toys. You also can go one step further and create an exciting bath adventure. You can purchase themed bath kits at toy stores.

The Pirates of the Tub play set includes 36 foam pieces that make pirate figurines, islands, a raft, boats and the Jolly Roger flag. The pieces will stick onto tiles, the wall or sides of the bath tub. The set also includes three pirate squirters that your kid will love.

What to Do When Your Stepchild Screams, ‘You’re Not My Mom/Dad!’

By Clark Rich Burbidge and Leah Dee Burbidge

This phrase has been heard in most blended families at one point or another.

When we were married in 2005, there was scant practical literature ‘How To” addressing the challenges faced in blended families. In addition, it was an uncomfortable public topic.

The conversation inevitably turned toward one’s personal story, an awkward subject at best.

We’ve learned a few things in the trenches since then and are thrilled to discuss one the most basic principles of long-term success…developing effective cross-border communication.

In doing so, we borrow heavily from our new book on this topic.

Start from where each child is.  Most blended family members have experienced the dislocation of absence, divorce or death.

The associated trauma is real.

Remarriage can produce additional disruption due to relocation, separation from support groups, re-establishing social structure, sharing space with strangers and new parental and sibling relationships among countless others.

The key to communication is often found in where parents begin. Spend time listening to understand each child. Knowing better where each child is, and how they perceive their new reality, sets the stage.

You cannot progress from where you think/expect a child should be or where they are supposed to be. Starting from where a child IS NOT ensures daily feelings of inadequacy and failure. A parent must begin from where that child is. This is usually different for each child.

However, when you begin from where they are, every step is a success. Why? Because you are experiencing it with them as your relationship grows naturally from the new soil in which you are both planted.

Respect the Bio-Compass. There is usually a deep pre-existing relationship between the bio-parent and their child. The non-bio parent may be a fantastic person and have a developing bond with the non-bio-children, but it takes time and may never be the same.

That is both normal and okay. The non-bio parent will have opportunities for positive interaction but there will be times when only the bio-parent can respond. Recognizing these and being willing to take a step back while the bio-parent leads is a learned skill and a gift to your children. This often requires a parent to swallow their pride and remain selflessly silent in the moment.

This does not mean withdrawing. In fact, it requires that the less involved parent actively support and sustain the bio-parent. Rest assured that, as you respect this relationship, it will be noticed.

There will come a time when your input is sought.

Misdirection works. We have discovered over the years that the best response to a child’s dramatic or traumatic moments is not the frontal assault. Here are three more effective approaches.

First, progress is often better realized not in the moment when emotions are high. A better time will always become available. Second, distraction works. If two of your children argue over a particular toy, work together and get them separately interested in something else. As they grow older it is more likely to involve mean kids, perceived unfairness, disappointment in school or social feedback or falling short in achieving a goal or dream. It never hurts to turn the conversation in another direction.

Finally, when tough conversations or discipline are necessary, we often tell the end first. None of our children like to be asked to join mom and dad in the study.

They know what that means. We have found that the best way to help them focus, rather than waiting with anxious distraction for the other shoe to drop, is to start the conversation with, “We want you to know we are not mad.” Or “…you are not in trouble.” This relieves pressure and allows more effective learning.

The key trait for blended family success. One evening a teenage son came to us asking about the most important trait he should look for in friends and ultimately a spouse.

We let him name several then made one addition to his list…Kindness. We have discovered in blended family relationships or choosing a spouse, friends or mentors that kindness is always near the top of the list. Kindness opens the door to all other virtues.

If a person is kind, they will more likely be patient, honest, thoughtful, respectful, selfless and able to love unconditionally. We teach and expect such traits to be exhibited by each child and try to consistently provide appropriate examples.

While we often feel painfully imperfect, we celebrate each step of the journey. Our blended symphony encourages each instrument its solo voice. But we also recognize that beautiful music created together is something more than what could have been produced individually.

If we can do it from where we started, anyone can. Each blended family member is good enough to make a priceless contribution.

About the Authors: Clark and Leah Burbidge are 14 years into their blended family experience and loving life more than ever with ten children and their eight spouses, eight grandchildren and counting. Their practical ‘autobiographical/how to’ guide is contained in a new Gold Medal award winning book, Living in the Family Blender: 10 Principles of a Successful Blended Family, July (2019 – Deep River Books.)

Preginistas: What to Wear to the 4th of July Cook Out

Happy Birthday, America!!

If you’re expecting this Independence Day, you may be wondering what to wear to the cookout, picnic or Fireworks celebration going on later today.

Temperatures along many coasts in the US will creep up to the 90s today so you want to make sure you stay cool.

I recommend wearing the lightest of fabrics, ideally cotton or preferbly a light linen.

If you own a kaftan or tunic made of very breathable fabrics, go with that! If not an A-line or sheath dress will do.

If you’re further along, an empire waist blouse with your comfy cropped maternity stretch jeans will be perfect.

On your feet, skip the wedges and stick with sandals.

Avoid flip flops because they can be a hazard if there are spills or if you’ll be walking in areas with a lot of dirt and grass.

If you plan to do a bit of walking, for example, to set up for your family’s spot along the fireworks route, then go with some canvas shoes.

Now, traditionally, I’ve done a post highlighting all of the celebrities who have worn Stars and Stripes American Flag apparel to celebrate the 4th of July, Memorial, Veterans or some other patriotic American Day.

However, given new awareness that is kinda against an old law to wear Old Glory in anything other than a FLAG, here are creative ways to wear stars and stripes:

Even for the kids! By the way: our partners at Janie and Jack are having a 20%off sale!

Have fun!