10 Principles for Stage moms or Soccer Dads to Live by…

This week, I penned a post on the Family Today section of The Washington Times Communities section. In it, I talk about parents living vicariously through the children. Check out the entire WTC Post here.

The article ends with me sharing 10 principles or self-awareness messages for that those who feel they may have the personality to be extreme with their support and encouragement of their children’s activities. I’ve listed them below. Feel free to share (discreetly, of course) with that annoying show offy pushy mom or dad in your life! If that person is you, no offense, you got to get a grip!

1. I will accept the talents, strengths and weaknesses of each of my children.

2. I will acknowledge that they need to go through challenges and complex situations on their own and to learn from failures.
3. I will not berate them and make them feel less valuable based on how they perform because I do not want to cause undue stress, anxiety, or resentment towards me or their activity.
4. I will let them know I am proud of them no matter what.
5. I will guide them and show them how to be better at their activity but in a manner that does not make them feel worthless.
6. I will be sensitive to my children’s developing need for praise and sympathy and will limit my criticism to really important mistakes because I want them accept success with humility and defeat with determination to do better.
7. I will not mention, beyond a casual reference, the successes of other children and will definitely not use another child’s success as a barometer for my child.
8. I will be a good spectator at athletic contests and not hound on what I perceive as a missed call by a referee or coach because I do not want my child to see my participation as an embarrassment.
9. I will teach my children sportsmanlike behavior and to not laugh at or taunt another less skilled child or teammate.
10. I will make sure I always have my own adult hobby or activity to enjoy and love so I don’t have to live vicariously through my child.  

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